Joke #224

A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.

Joke #223

Patient: Doctor doctor, I think I need glasses.
Waiter: You certainly do, you've just walked into a fast food joint!!

Joke #222

Dad: "Doctor! Doctor! my son has swallowed a pen!" Doc: Use a pencil!

Joke #221

words of wisdom: If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.

Joke #220

Life lesson: Good judgement comes from experience. Unfortunately, experience usually comes from bad judgement.

Joke #219

A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it because the thief was spending less than his wife did.

Joke #218

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about his future until he gets a wife

Joke #217

What's better than a talking dog? A spelling bee.

Joke #216

How to fly: 'good' landing is one from which you can walk away. A 'great' landing is one after which they can use the plane again.

Joke #215

What do you get when you cross Lassie with a rose? A collie flower.

Joke #214

What do you call a dog who helps you carry hot things? An oven mutt.

Joke #213

What did the cat get on the test? A purr-fect score.

Joke #212

DAD: When Abe Lincoln was your age, he walked to school, uphill, in the snow, daily. SON: When Abe was your age, dad, he was president!

Joke #208

How did the astronaut feel when he ran into the alien with six lasers for arms? Stunned.

Joke #211

How do you turn a scientist into a mad scientist? Step on his toes.

Joke #210

How does the man on the moon trim his hedge? H-eclipse it.

Joke #209

How do you throw the best party in the universe? You plan-et

Joke #207

What do you call a boy floating in the pool? bob.

Joke #206

What do they serve at the cyber cafe? Silicon chips with dip.

Joke #205

Why was the car smelly? It had to much gas.

Joke #204

Why do basketball players stay home in the off-season? Because the aren't allowed to TRAVEL!